The Chef isn’t looking to good.

Posted by Ironspike on Jul 24, 2011 in General, Pictures & Video | 0 comments

I’m not eating anything he’s on!

Zombies!

Posted by Ironspike on Jul 21, 2011 in General, Pictures & Video | 0 comments

A few weeks ago I was introduced to a new app for my iPhone called ZombieBooth by MotionPortrait, Inc.

It has to be the best .99 cents I’ve ever spent.

Basically you take a photo of something (human works the best) and ZombieBooth will convert it to a “Living Motion Zombie Portrait”.

Needless to say this has provided me hours and hours of entertainment.  Creating zombies of people is easy. After a while you start getting bored with typical folks.  I started to wonder what would some folks look like if they were zombie-fied?

Have you ever wondered what would the Angle soft baby look like as a zombie? What about Chef Boyardee?

As a new feature I think I will add a new section to my blog called: Zombie Photo of the Day.

Now, I procrastinate a lot so it might actually be “Zombie Photo of the Day – every now and then”.

I have to give the developers of this app some props. The are able to ‘blend’ in colors very good.

Here I have taken a picture of the Pillsbury Doughboy and Used ZombieBooth to zombify him.

Pillsbury Deadboy - 4

These are only still frames – the app will also make the picture move and eat your finger. Which is totally awesome!

Here are few other variation of the zombification.

Pillsbury Deadboy - 1

This is by far my favorite.

Pillsbury Deadboy - 2

Pillsbury Deadboy - 3

Playing with Fire

Posted by Ironspike on Jun 27, 2011 in General | 0 comments

I was giving some advice to a friend on how to get his blog started. One tip I gave him was to update frequently so he could keep the content “fresh”.

Yeah,  like I do.

So, figured I’d better put something out here.

I’m reaching way back in archives for this story.

When I was young I loved to play with fire. Dad called me the little ‘firebug’. He also whooped my ass more times than I can count for starting fires.

Under the bed, in the trash can, outside in the barn – no place was safe from me.

On a positive note I never hurt or destroyed anything (thank god).

One of things I used to do – I’d get a lit match and mom’s Perma-net  hairspray (single pump ).  When I would spray it over the match it would make a neat little ‘fire cloud’.

I was totally fascinated by this.

One day (and I don’t know why) I sat down in the chair and put the bottle in the floor between my feet. I could see perfectly in the bottle (looked like I was praying). I lit a match and dropped it in the bottle.

What do you think happened?

All I can say is “THANK GOD” that hairspray and gasoline have the same type of combustible properties. Only the vapor burns. Other wise when that 4 foot flame that shot up and out of the bottle and totally engulfed my head could have done a lot more damage than just singeing my eyebrows and part of my hair.

My fascination with fire at that point in time had ‘worn’ off and I was quickly running around the house putting up matches and hairspray.

To my utter surprise that when mom walked in the door she knew exactly what I had been doing. Well not exactly but she was pretty damn close in the fact that it dealt with fire.

After my spanking and I went to the bedroom completely dumbfounded on the fact – how did she know?

Passing the bathroom on the way I glanced in the mirror to see that I just didn’t singe my eyebrows –  I burned them completely off plus a large portion of my hair.

Mom didn’t have to punishment with a spanking – walking around with out eyebrows is one of the worst punishments in the world.

Baggy Pants

Posted by Ironspike on Jun 7, 2011 in General | 0 comments

It’s been a while since my last update. I’ve been a little all over the place and decided that my next few blog posts will be dedicated to “Issues in Society & Social Media”.

So, you ask: “Ironspike – Can you  please enlighten us with your genius intellect and fascinating insight?”

Yes, young padowan – I can.

The topic for today is: Baggy Pants .

I’m in Kroger the other day minding my own business. I was pushing my retarded buggy (you know the buggy – the one with only 3 working wheels) over to the lunch meat counter. Kroger sells some kick ass Private Selection Smoke House ham (check that shit out- it’s awesome!). I tell the old lady behind the counter I want two pounds of ham and then I turn around and start people watching.

Two guy walk by sporting the “Baggy Pants” look. I can see their boxers. A few thoughts run through my mine:

First, “Why?”

Second, “They are wearing belts. Why?”

Third, “Mom and dad let you out of the house like that? Why?”

I don’t care how old you are. I don’t care how you try to slice it. I don’t care who else is doing it. The baggy pants fad is just plain fucking stupid. If it looks retarded then most likely IT IS RETARDED.

So, I’ll answer the questions above in order:

“Why do people wear that shit?”

Answer: I’m pretty sure that 99.9% of the people who are sporting the baggy pants look have no clue where it came from. They seen someone else do it.. and “oh shit..they are doing it must be cool! I’ll do it too!” Then when laws and school punish offenders who violate dress codes – the first thing you hear is “Your trying to take my individualism away!”

Wake up dumb ass! You didn’t invent that idiotic style you copied it from another loser. The whole fad (from my understanding) originated from prison attire. Yeah, that’s a fashion I wanna copy.

Next, “Why are you wearing a belt with your baggy ass pants?”

This one puzzles me. The whole fad of the baggy pants started from prison folks who’s pants were too big and they were baggy. Prisoners were not allowed to wear belts to hold them up. So, this raises the question “If prisoners had belts would this fad still have started?” – I doubt it. I’m almost %100 sure that an inmate would rather have a belt to keep their pants up.

Think about it: if some randy inmates were going to gang rape some poor soul – who would they pick first? The guy who is wearing his pants up to his chest and looks like Urckle –or- the man who’s pants is already hanging down to his knees?

Last, “Mom and dad let you wear crap like that?”

The sad answer to this is yes. Mothers and fathers let their kids wear just about anything. And honestly, there isn’t one good justification as to why. It’s just stupid. I come from an age where the parents held the authority in the house hold. In this day and age the roles are reversed. It’s a sad time we live in.