Bonesnap

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm

together, and then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the

baby is  born, they rush to the hospital.

 

 A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and

 screaming. Over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely.

 

 A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the two gays she

points out  the happy child as theirs.

 

“Isn’t it wonderful?” one gay says to the other. “All these

Unhappy  babies… and yet our baby is so happy. This  just proves our

love for one another.”

 

The nurse says, “Oh sure, he’s happy now. But just watch what

happens when we pull the pacifier out of his ass.”

A  man is sitting next to the window in an airliner, which is about to take

off, when another man with a Labrador Retriever sits down  in the two empty

seats alongside him.

 

The Lab is situated in the middle,  and the first man is looking

quizzically at the dog when the second man  explains that they work

for the airline.

 

The dog’s handler said, “Don’t  mind Sniffer… he’s a “sniffing” dog,

The best there is; I’ll show you once  we get airborne when I put him to

work.”

 

The plane takes off and  levels out when the handler says to the first

man,  “Watch this.” He  tells the dog, “Sniffer, search.”

 

Sniffer jumps down, walks along the  aisle, and sits next to a woman

For a few seconds. He then returns to his  seat and puts one paw on the

handler’s arm. His master pats him on the head  and tells him “Gooood

boy!”

 

The handler turns to the first man and says,  “That woman is in

possession of  marijuana, so I’m making a note of this  and her seat

number for the police, who will apprehend her on  arrival.”

 

That’s unbelievable!” replies the first man.

 

Once again  the handler sends Sniffer to search the aisles. The Lab

sniffs about, sits  down beside a man for a few seconds, returns to

its seat, and places two paws  on the handler’s arm.

 

The handler says, “That man is carrying cocaine, so  again I’m making

A note of this and the seat number.”

 

Amazing!” says  the first man.

 

A third time the handler sends Sniffer to search the  aisles. Sniffer

goes up and down the plane and after a while sits down next  to

someone. He then comes racing back, jumps up onto his seat, and craps all  over the

place.

 

The first man is really grossed out by this behavior from  a

Supposedly well-trained sniffing dog and asks, “What the hell was that all 

about?”

 

The handler nervously replies, “Sniffer just found a  bomb…”